When You Hit The Jersey-Wall...

Over our lifetimes, we travel many highways. For the most part we stay in our lanes. But, occasionally, we get distracted and wander over the lines. We allow our thoughts, facebook status, children, romantic interests, problems or other people's problems to move us out of our lane. This continues until we hit a wall...

Walls, walls, walls are everywhere! We throw up walls, when situations arise. We collide with walls of unresolved issues and everyday distractions. We help build walls dabbling in people's business. We hit wall, after wall, trying to do everything with our own strength.

A good friend of mine told me a story of how she was driving and she swerved to avoid an accident and in turn, hit a jersey-wall. Her car bounced off the wall and put her back in her lane. When she pulled over and examined the car, not a scratch was on it. The jersey-wall had reordered her route and saved her life.

I am hear to tell you that there is one wall that you can hit, anytime, when you need direction. This jersey-wall is rock-solid with supernatural strength. There is no storm, test, or trial that will displace it and no man that can move it. It is mortared with blood and anchored in solid ground. It gives direction to the directionless, discernment to the blind, light in bouts of darkness, joy in sorrows and blessings for days to come.

No, this is not your average, roadside, jersey-wall. This wall, this rock, is Jesus! There is not a problem that you cannot bounce back from when you turn it over to Him!

Allow the Lord to be your guide, His Word to be your vehicle with prayer as your driving axle and faith as your steering wheel!

Don't allow your life to hit the wall, in any other circumstance in order for you to recognize that you need God's love and direction. Once you seek Him, when you cross the line on your chosen path Jesus will set you back on your journey and see to it that you reach your destination, safely!

I thank God, for my Jersey-Wall...Drive Carefully!

TGBTG (To God Be The Glory)! ~TQ
©2011 by Turquoise C.A. Hayes

It's Nice Knowing "You"...

In this life, we journey on many quests. We venture out seeking education and higher learning, job opportunities, friendships, companionship, acquaintances, and love. Our beings revolve around relationships, or the lack thereof, and often we find ourselves remiss – searching for something we are innately missing deep within.

We reach out to others, in hopes that they have that special something to fill that void. We try drugs, sex, and alcohol to assuage that aching, empty feeling. But, nothing seems to do the trick. There is something that we missed. The puzzle seems almost complete. We're so close to happiness but, it escapes us just as we reach to grasp it.

You ask yourself, "What is wrong? What am I missing?"

The answer is YOU.

We spend so much time focused on others – what she's got, who he's with, what my neighbor's driving, how my co-worker got promoted – that we fail to take a look at and know ourselves. We have no idea who we are.

If you ask the average person who they are, they will define themselves by what they do and what they have. But, who you are is far greater than what can be seen to the outside world. Who you are on the inside is what truly defines you and makes up your character. Therefore, we need to get our inner man on the up and up – you know, get our insides right!

That missing piece, that quest, this journey; begins with you. Until you recognize who you are – beyond the hurt, above your trials, ahead of your afflictions, beneath your grief, through your triumphs, in those quiet hours, in moments of praise – you will be lost on that same, lonesome path.

Identifying who you are is no walk in the park. It is not an easy or quickly orchestrated task. It is an intimate journey on which you examine every inch of your being. What you seek to define is your strong points, faults, strengths, weaknesses, concerns, prejudices – examining yourself as if you were diagnosed and trying to expel an infectious disease. You leave no stone unturned and no issue unattended until you know who you are. Remembering, that you are more than the wrongs you've done, more than the mistakes you've made. You are more than a moment in time and much more than a memory. Learn to forgive yourself and learn to love you.

Loving yourself doesn't mean taking on a selfish spirit. It is not self-centeredness and making each and everything revolve around you. It simply means embracing this life and your right to live in it, peacefully. Coming to terms with your inner man. Doing so, brings you a level of happiness that cannot be purchased...

My friends, I don't suggest that you move through such an undertaking alone. One of the reasons you have circled back to this same issue over and over is because you thought that you can find you all by yourself. (And you see how far you've gotten on your own.) You are not alone. The same help that I have – the same resource that keeps raising me up – the same light unto my path is waiting to help you. All you have to do IS ASK.

Jesus is my help. Without Him I have nothing and there is no me to know. But, with Him there is nothing impossible and nothing I can't conquer. Even when the quest is to know myself. So everyday, now that He is the head of my life, I can look in the mirror and say, "It's Nice Knowing You."

TGBTG (To God Be The Glory)! ~TQ
©2011 by Turquoise C.A. Hayes

Looking for A MAN: I Beg to Differ!

Alright ladies, we have all been there. You know – walking the streets of loneliness, feeling like we are ready for more, running a spreadsheet of qualifications – looking for a man. We've spent countless hours summing up what we can take, what we can deal with, lists and lists of characteristics that "the one" must or will have, only to find, "Mr. Commitment Phobic", "Mr. Needs a Mama, not a Wife", "Mr. I'm Married" (to another woman, to his career, to his children) [*yes, I said children...some men hide behind their kids as an excuse not to commit], "Mr. I Look Too Good for One Woman". The lists of these fellas goes on and on. So what is the problem? Why can't we find that guy we dream of?

First, we have to realize that we are on the wrong path. Yes, we are liberated, vibrant, women, living in an age where we go out and "get what we want". The world is our oyster, so why is it that we keep coming home with crabs? Where did we go wrong? The journey begins from within.

There are no steps that we should take on the path of seeking a man. "He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord, Proverbs 18:22" [Emphasis added]. See, we are not meant to be the seekers. We are treasures – waiting – to be found, to be discovered, for eyes to open. We spend so much time trying to make a perfect 6 out of Mr. Wrong; that we have no time to make ourselves ready for the type of commitment we seek. Your perfect 10 is out there, but he is waiting for you to blossom before his eyes, and radiate your beauty that runs deep – from the inside out! We've got to start loving ourselves, honoring our God, readying our lives with purpose and self worth before we can have, and keep, the love that is out there for us.

This is no task for the weak at heart or for the non-diligent mind. You have to be deliberate in your walk and steady on your path. You will step into pitfall after pitfall relationship until you get your house in order. How will you ever get a man who thinks you are worthwhile when you don't believe that yourself? Resolve your issues, right your relationships with your parents and families, clean up your finances, join that group you've always wanted to join, take care of that health issue, go to or back to school, attend and join a church – learn to love, respect, care for and value yourself. Then in the midst of your busy schedule of activities, prayer meetings and work, Mr. Right will find you.

He will do the work and make strides in seeking you out. There will be no hard labor on your part. You won't have to track him down and stalk his Facebook page. He will do what is right, because you are right for him – and he knows it! "What God has joined together, let no man put asunder (pull apart), Mark 10:9". Not only will you feel loved; you will know true love, because first, you loved yourself enough to know what real love feels like.

So now, are you looking for a man? I'm not...I beg to differ. I am patiently waiting for him to discover ME.

TGBTG! (To God Be The Glory) ~TQ
©2011 by Turquoise C.A. Hayes

P.S. - We will talk about "Waiting" soon!

National Women and Girls HIV/AIDS Awareness Day!

Today, March 10, is Rock the Red Pump™ and Rock the Red Tie™ for NWGHAAD! It’s a nationwide initiative to raise awareness about the increasing impact of HIV/AIDS on women & girls and encourages ladies to take action. While progress has definitely been made in the areas of AIDS prevention and treatment, women still represent 27% of all new AIDS diagnoses, with African-American women accounting for 66% of that group. This year focuses on this statistic, “Every 35 minutes, a woman tests positive for HIV in the United States.”

Relate - Release - Relax

We have all heard the phrase Relax, Relate, Release when we are dealing with stressful things in our lives. We sit down and try to "wooo-sah" our way through hard times. The trials, keep coming and we keep humming until our kettle whistles and we boil over from frustration. So what do you do?

I beg to differ from the phrase above. I know, I know it is an age old adage, but sometimes it is time to clean the cobwebs out of our thoughts and look at things from a fresh perspective. I say that although the words are good...they are in the wrong order. I propose that we instead Relate, Release and Relax.

So, what exactly am I talking about?

Relate -
We all want to feel like we are a part of something meaningful and worthwhile. We want to be loved and respected. We want confirmation that what we strive to do, when done for the appropriate reasons, is right and earnest. We want relationships that embody all things love.

The ultimate relationship...the root to all relationships and relating is Christ. He is the true example of love, kindness, selflessness and joy. Once you are in relationship with Christ, watch how your life changes: your mood, your point of view (you have a new positive outlook on life), your situations...they all change for the better. Why? Because you are not alone. You don't have to walk the pathway, go through that trial, celebrate that triumph alone, anymore! God is with you...he will never leave you or forsake you.

Release -
When you are going through trials and struggles you now know you are not alone. You have Christ to depend on to see you through any storm. Worry, doubt, fear, addictions, grief, pain...you can "Give it All to God". Through prayer, and communion and simply talking with Jesus about your problems, the discernment of what to do to resolve your situation will come to light. This revelation comes in many forms...a friend with a comforting word, a sermon heard on T.V., an announcement on the radio, words read in a paper or a magazine. The Lord talks to us in many ways (and yes, sometimes even directly).

Relax -
Once you have Christ as the focus and love in your life, you can relax. You know that God's got it! No worries, no fears...just peace and contentment. Now that would make a happy day!

So, you see...there is no greater love and all this time we've had it wrong...do a little relating, releasing and relaxing.

Be Blessed
~TQ

Prayer (To Accompany the Prior Blast)

Prayer

Earth, I am
Heaven, reflect your light in me
Plant joy within
Sow seeds of purpose
in will and way
For I am a vessel awaiting fertility
Let the skies shed tears of mercy
to cleanse this soiled soul
with the purity of your grace
So I may bloom in your presence
Though I am not worthy
Yet, still, you love me

At times, I may be trampled
wind-blown, and heavy laden
The ground may shake with rocket force
and the mountains revolt
against the plains
With your love surrounding
I can cry with the rocks
and sing with the trees
Live my life in testimony
before time turns dirt to dust
and I follow the light in your eyes
For it is earth, I am
consciously waiting for you
©2009 by Turquoise C.A. Hayes

Are You Too Full?

We are living in desperate times. Poverty, illness, natural disasters, wars. Our everyday lives are heavy laden with plagues and problems. We are a vessel, in the ocean of life, barely keeping afloat; nearly drowning, minutes from sinking, in the messes we've created.

We have grown too comfortable with discomfort. Too complacent in our sins.
We fight no battles, win no wars, climb no mountains and claim no victories. We just waddle in our mess. Using others for our gain - mess. Lying, cheating, and fornicating to fill the void in our lives - mess. Cussing and swearing to make our points known - mess. Drinking and substance abusing to ease the pain of our realities - mess. Killing, fighting, and causing disturbances to cover our lies - mess. And it is time to pull the plug.

Remember we are vessels, out in the sea of life. We are almost drowning and when we cry out to the Lord, there is no room left within us to receive His blessings. We are too full of our own mess.

But there is an answer...
Within every vessel there is a plug, a release. It is time that we find our plugs and pull them, so that the mess in our lives, filling up our vessels, can be released into the sea. But pulling the plug is not enough.

Now that we are no longer drowning we have let go of our vessel and be filled with the Holy Spirit. He will be our guide, navigator and often our anchor. He is wisdom and our counselor. His guidance and understanding surpass any because He is the third part of the Trinity and He is "God With Us". Until you let go and let God, there is no room and you are merely a stifled and heavy vessel.

Take time in prayer to lay down your burdens. Open your heart and mind. Calmer seas are around the corner and even when a storm brews in your life you can rest assured that the Holy Spirit is your navigator, confidant and counselor. You will never be forgotten or forsaken and He will always lead you to peaceful shores.

TGBTG! (To God Be The Glory) ~TQ
©2011 by Turquoise C.A. Hayes